Side effects

If anyone asked me what the worst part of having and curing cancer was I would immediately shout...CHEMOTHERAPY! Before cancer I was so naive about the whole disease, although far from being an expert I definitely feel I own the rights to some knowledge, based on experience. I think Matt's a pro too! I feel very blessed to have not known the brutality of curing the disease before hand because I probably would have been more hesitant to even receive treatments because the side effects have been so harsh! Below is a list of my side effects. Take a gander if you please, it is total honesty so don't be alarmed! 

1. Hair loss- obviously everyone knows this one comes with chemo. The reality of losing my hair was devastating and painful. Now I'm just waiting for my new hair to grow and to never wear hats again! 

2. Nausea-almost everyone knows this is common too! My battle with nausea will always be on going! Although miracle drugs make it easier to live with. 

3. The pain- I had no idea there would be pain associated with chemo. Extreme pain really! I have never been in pain before cancer aside from stomachaches and headaches so I don't really do well with the pain. Each week as the pain starts in, I mentally have to remind myself I am still a human being and loved and it will pass, because by about day 10

It usually does!!! At one point my pain was so bad we had to rush to the ER because I was literally becoming delirius from the pain! 2 rounds of morphine did not even relieve it! Thats how serious it was! Scary too!! 

4. Vision changes- this has been a big bummer! Going into cancer I already had far from perfect eye sight and with chemo it has gotten worse. So much to the point my left eye is partially going blind-ish! They say I can regain my eye sight and I believe I can too :) its been hard because I'd much rather read than watch tv but reading has proven too eye straining and difficult. Netflix it is! Haha 

5. Shortness of breath- this is one of the main reasons I knew I needed to go to the doctor before I was actually diagnosed, I couldn't breathe! I actually was about to talk to the doctor and ask if

I had some exhaustion issues!?! Because I would be huffing and puffing just walking up the stairs. Well come to find out I had a tumor decreasing my lung capacity to 30%. Well with chemo you

Typically sustain lung damage, this is all too true for me! I expect to get some of my lung strength back and i cannot wait to not only run but walk on my own!!! 

6. Skin changes- with chemo my skin has turned black, blue and purple. One of my chemo drugs is notorious for this. Annoying but won't last forever! 

7. Chemo brain- wow this I probably should have put at the top of the list. With chemo sometimes I have extreme short term memory loss. It has been scary at times because I cannot remember what happened the day before and lose parts of my day where I cannot for the life of me remember. Luckily I have Matt to tell me what happened. One thing that has helped me to calm down during these episodes is to go through the pictures on my phone and just take a second to calm down and remember. It is a weird situation when you cannot remember what happened earlier that day but it is one of the most common side effects! We have been very careful to always remember to turn off the stove, lock the doors, and not take showers alone! :) 

8. Loss of white blood cells-while on chemo over time you eventually loose all 

of your white blood cells. This sucks! This means you have no more immune system and have to be extremely careful not to catch any sort of disease or bad pathogen! In other words you become a shut in! Because with no immune system a simple cold will turn into pneumonia which could then cause you to have an infection in your blood which means you are in the ICU for weeks! Luckily (knock on wood) Matt and I have been extremely careful although at times we cheat for my sanity and have no gotten any form of sickness. My doctors have even advised me to call them even if I get a paper cut the threat is so serious!!! 

Well I could go on forever telling you little details here and there but these are just some I thought were interesting to share. 

This is just a little insight of what goes on during chemotherapy treatment. I want everyone to know despite all of these horrible side effects I am still positive and although some will be permanent I plan on making a full recovery and will adapt and live my life with love and happiness! I do hate my surgery scars and am working on accepting them along with other changes! I am excited about life and am lucky to have the best partner in crime husband who reminds me everyday I am still a human being and extremely loved!